Lifestyles of the poor and nameless

I saw Mr. Chips aka Frat boy on Tuesday; he graciously chauffeured me to a meeting that I had in New Jersey. I knew that I had this meeting coming up, so I tried to spend some time with him the weekend before the meeting, but it didn't happen. I hate to rely on favors from people and I didn't want it to seem like I only saw him when I needed to go somewhere.

In days gone by, frat boy and I used to talk everyday; sometimes twice/day. I enjoyed the attention, but I knew it was bcause he had an interest beyond friendship. In recent history, he's been distant and our conversations have been pretty generic. We probably speak once or twice/week, outside of scant emails and IMs.

I have this meeting again next week, so despite our awkward interactions these days, I offered to take him out to dinner after the meeting. At least he can't say that I just used him and never gave back.

I miss the conversations we had in the early days, but I understand why things are this way. He's 29, educated, owns 2 houses and he's ready to settle down and have a family. He doesn't want friends. He wants a girlfriend that can later be his wife. I don't think this is desperate at all. The man knows what he wants and since I can't oblige, I won't waste his time.

Why is it that when a guy takes this approach, he's "focused", but when a woman takes this approach, she's "needy"?